Collateral Damage

As much as I hate having MS, what I hate even more is that everyone around me in some way has it, too. Sure, I'm the one who has to deal with the symptoms and take the shots and have the MRI's, but they're the ones who have to stand by and watch and deal with the fallout of this damn disease. And that makes me feel horrible.

I was reminded of that again this morning. This weekend, the fatigue hit me hard. No matter how much sleep I got, it felt as if I never went to sleep. I should have known this was coming. Too many weeks of doing too much. Too much saying "yes" when I knew I should have said "no." And it came back to bite me in the ass.

And that's where my amazing daughter comes into the picture. Knowing how exhausted I was, she got up at 7:30 with her little sister. She got her dressed, fed her breakfast and kept her occupied. She unloaded and loaded the dishwasher. She matched the socks. She kept her brother and other sister quiet. She let me sleep until 10:30.

She's only 13. She shouldn't have to do that. But she does--all the time, without being asked, without complaining. And it kills me.

When I tell her I'm sorry that she has to deal with this, she simply says, "It's O.K., Mom." But not for me. It will never be O.K. for me. So if you see my little girl, who is so not little in her actions, give her a hug. She deserves it.